A Peek Into the Life of a Diehard Steelers Fan

I have been asked time and time again how on earth I became a Steelers fan considering I grew up in Tennessee. So I will share a few family photos and maybe you will gain some insight as to how I became me.

This is baby Chanin. From what I was told my parents showed me a Dallas Cowboys cheerleader outfit and I puked up my baby food all over that. Upon seeing the Steelers outfit I smiled for a week straight and stopped having massive diarrhea.

This is my dog, TB (Terry Bradshaw...duh!). I have her trained on command to piss on anything with the Cowboys logo on it.

This is my ride. I know you are jealous...don't be a hater.

This is my house. I just don't think you are a real Steelers fan unless your front steps are painted black and gold baby! Let's take a look inside...

This is my living room. Some say I might have overdone it a bit with the yellow paint on the walls but it was either yellow or black and I think the yellow brightens the room and accents all my wonderful collectibles.

This is my bedroom. I really wanted to paint the walls yellow in here but the landlord finally caught on and told me if I put one more stroke of yellow paint on his house he would shove the paintbrush up my ass sideways. He must be a Cowboys fan. Uptight bastard.

This is my boyfriend Jerry. Isn't he hot??? He debated long and hard about whether to get me an engagement ring or this tattoo and the tattoo won. That was 6 years ago. He says he has been behind on his bills ever since and one day he will get me a ring and we will be married on Heinz Field. I am so lucky to have found him. What a catch!

This is my brother Steve. He has a Sunday ritual of running up and down his street right before the game starts. We are not sure if he does this because he loves the Steelers so much or because he was recently released from a mental institution and just loves his freedom and wide open spaces.

This is Javon, my brother from another mother (very very long story). He is a truck driver and has his truck decked out. Jerry likes to tell me Javon likes boys because he brings one home with him after every run but I don't believe that for a second. Javon told me they are interior decorators from all over the country and they give him ideas on how to decorate his house. Jerry is so stupid sometimes.

This is my cousin Wanda. She likes Ben Roethlisberger and Oreos. Lots of Oreos...

Last but not least...this is my mom. She said when she dies I will inherit her "Terrible Bra". Is it bad that I cannot wait??? Damn I want that bra! She says if I continue to piss her off she will write me out of her will so I have started seriously kissing her ass. Last week I polished her bowling ball and shoes, then dropped off a case of her favorite cocktail...Jack Daniels. That should keep me in the will for at least another month or two.

There you have it...a peek into my crazy Steelers world. Hope you enjoyed it. GO Steelers!

The Real Reason Derrick Mason Unretired

One of my sources e-mailed me a copy of a letter that Joe Flacco sent to Derrick Mason. I thought I would share this with you...it totally explains why Derrick Mason unretired and came into Ravens camp this afternoon.

Dear D-Mason,

How you doing??? Playing lots of golf and enjoying your retirement I hope.

There is a very good reason I am writing you today. I have no one left to throw the ball to. Oh yea, I know Todd Heap and Mark Clayton but really??? Come on. Heap is out for weeks if he stubs his toe and Clayton drops everything I throw his way. That bastard Drew Bennett retired last week so I am seriously running out of options quickly. So I am writing to you with hopes of you unretiring and joining the team again. Brett Favre and MJ did it, why can't you?

I think we stand a real chance this year of going to the Superbowl and let me tell you why...Roethlisberger is all distracted by his TV repair woman problems and when he is distracted he plays like hell. This is our only chance to ever get past them! They beat us 3 times last year but I think this just might be our year my friend.

Now look, I don't want to get pushy or anything but let me just throw this out there. If you don't come back and come back quickly, I will be forced to release the sex video of me and your Mom. It might be a little embarrassing for me but mainly for you because I am sure you have heard by now...once you go Flacco you don't go backo. Holla!

Your buddy,
Joe Flacco

Cyborg Is A Dude

Just look at this photo taken at the ESPY awards. Look how much bigger this chick is than Gina Carano. Look how manly she looks in a dress. Where does she buy her shoes/boots???

The August 15th fight is fast approaching and I am very frightened for Gina. I am going to root like hell that she can pull this off but seeing things like this makes me have my doubts. I really think she should be tested before being allowed into the octagon.

Gina I love you but I hope you won't have to have plastic surgery to put your face back together after this one!

Jimmy's Freaky Frisky Friday

This is Dayona Mendoza. She was Miss Universe 2008. She is smoking hot. That is all you need to know. Enjoy!

Heath Miller Signs With The Steelers

Heath Miller has re-signed with the Pittsburgh Steelers. A 6 year contract worth a reported $35 million.

That is pretty good money for a tight end but I think he is worth every penny. He is probably the best blocking tight end in the league and he always seems to make a clutch catch just when the team needs it. Plus he signed some cards I sent him in the mail so he is A-OK in my book.

I am getting the feeling this team just might repeat! Wooooooo hoooooooo!

Reggie Bush Is Single Again

Reggie Bush and Kim Kardashian have broken up according to many sources this morning.

Good news ladies! This hot man is now available! Or for the guys...Kim Kardashian...but I really don't understand the fascination with her. I mean how did she become famous??? Because of her large ass??? At least Reggie has skills!

So until football season starts, I will admire this lovely photo of Reggie and his sweet abs. Don't be sad Reggie, you and Romo can go out hunting the ladies very soon.

Major TV Night Tonight

Tonight will be my first real test. Monday night is my big time tv night. Generally, I get home at 5:30pm and do not budge out of my chair until around 11pm.

I have recently become addicted to "The T.O. Show" on VH1. I love T.O. after watching the 1st episode last week. But sadly, I will have to miss him tonight.

I also watch "Obsessed" on Monday nights. This show follows around people with OCD issues. I think my main reason for watching is it just makes me feel a little less crazy for an hour.

But my main show on Monday nights..."My Life On The D List". I adore Kathy Griffin. I know most people find her very annoying and rude. But I love her. I think her mom Maggie is super cool and missing the episode tonight where she campaigns for gay rights is absolutely killing me.

I think it is high time I find a hobby or something...this is just sad.