Thursday, April 30, 2009

Nuggets Are Moving On

Oh it has been a long time coming...the Nuggets have finally advanced out of the 1st round of the playoffs. The addition of Chauncey Billups was huge to this team. They are really hot right now and I look for them to roll over the Dallas Mavericks and their nutty owner Mark Cuban.

Bring on the Mavericks!

Wednesday, April 29, 2009

Let's Get It On!

I love this man, bloody face and all. This is Forrest Griffin and he is my favorite UFC fighter. He is one of the toughest guys around...he has had his arm broken in the middle of the fight, continued fighting and knocked the guy out with his other arm. Yep, I know if my arm had been broken in a fight, I would first have pissed or soiled myself, fallen to the ground and cried like a baby. I might for a moment have thought, "I am going to kick the shit out of this dude", but then I would feel pain again and go back to my fetal position on the mat.

It was announced yesterday that this wonderful man will be fighting my most hated UFC fighter, Anderson Silva. The reason I hate him??? He never fights! He has a belt and I guess he wants to keep it so he does the least he can do to retain it. Anderson Silva cost me $55 and I want it back. His fight with Thales Leites was pathetic. Anderson can say all he wants that Leites would not engage him, but if I am the champ and you put me in an octagon and I get paid as much as he does, I will make a fight happen. I will stomp on his toes, bitch slap him, call his mamma names...whatever it takes to get a fight going.

I cannot wait for this fight. It takes place August 8th in Philadelphia, PA. I will buy this one because I know Forrest will go in there and let him have it. Forrest will whip my $55 out of him.

I will be so wound up for this fight it will be unreal. I am normally wound up the day of Forrest fights but this might be a bit over the top. I will probably buy fight shorts and run around clinching an imaginary Anderson Silva and give him a few knees to the forehead. Not really sure where all my aggression comes from...something that probably stems from my childhood as a bouncer at the family bar. I suppose I should address this with the shrink next session.

Anyways, big party at my house on August 8th. Just watch your back, if I get too into it I just might try to choke you out.

Tuesday, April 28, 2009

Edgerrin James Released

The Arizona Cardinals have released Edgerrin James.

It became pretty obvious this would happen after they drafted Beanie Wells in the 1st round of the draft on Saturday.

I am sure Edge will be scooped up fairly quickly, he still has a few good years left in him.

Monday, April 27, 2009

10 Random Things...

Slow sports you lucky folks get 10 more random things about me.

1. I don't really like cats at all but I think this photo is pretty funny.

2. I grew up in my family restaurant as their slave. The only benefit to this is I can cook a mean steak.

3. I hate being outdoors (unless to play golf). I would never camp out or be on Survivor.

4. I had a hole in one once. Love to play golf.

5. The only cheese I like is mozzarella. All of the rest of it is gross.

6. I think Oprah is the devil and try to discourage others from watching her.

7. I love rainy, stormy days.

8. I hate to cry and I hate when other girls cry and I feel like I should do something to cheer them up.

9. One of my goals in life is to own a beach house. For some reason watching water makes me feel relaxed and at peace.

10. I really want to do some sort of volunteer work, but I have not decided what I should do yet.

Sunday, April 26, 2009

The Bengals Bungle The Draft

This ladies and gentlemen, is Andre Smith. His name might sound familar to you because this is the o-lineman from Alabama that attended the combine and left quickly because he was not prepared for it. Uh huh. Could be because he forgot his bra for his giant bitch tits.

The talk was after leaving so quickly that his draft stock would fall and he would no longer be a first round draft pick. Well the Bengals changed that quickly on Saturday. They made this giant blob the number 6 pick in the draft.

The Bengals are probably one of the worst drafting teams in the NFL so this doesn't really shock me. Let's just revisit their 2005 draft.
Pick #1- David Pollack-career over due to injury
Pick #2- Odell Thurman-suspended due to substance abuse issues.
Pick #3- Chris Henry-this dude has been in so much trouble I would have to fill up the rest of the blog page with it all.

The quality of players that they let go to get this guy is amazing. The one that sticks out most is Michael Crabtree. Yes, he is injured but he will be ready by the time the season starts and at least he is not a fruitcake! Andre Smith just might abandon camp to go on a Dunkin' Donuts binge or Victoria's Secret shopping spree.

Hines Ward Will Retire A Steeler

The Steelers locked up receiver Hines Ward over the weekend. He signed a 4 year deal worth a reported $22 million.

Looks like Ward will get his wish and be able to retire as the greatest Steeler's receiver of all time.

I am happy just because this is one more jersey I have that won't have to go away.

Friday, April 24, 2009

Hey Wake UP NFL Draft Just Started!

That is right, the draft has started while you are drooling down your face having dreams of Megan Fox and a box of chocolate covered cherries (don't ask). Wake up people!

With the first pick...the Detroit Lions select...Matthew Stafford, quarterback, the University of Georgia. Matthew has been signed to a six year, $78 million dollar deal baby!

The St. Louis Rams are now on the clock...

Jimmy's Freaky Frisky Friday...Marisa Miller

This is Jimmy's Freaky Frisky Friday pick...Marisa Miller. I think he said she is a rocket scientist which I find just amazing that the girl has such an important job yet she still has time to look this hot in a swimsuit. Kudos Marisa Miller! You are the next victim of Jimmy's Freaky Frisky Friday.

Madden Cover Boys Announced

This is a disaster. They are having a co-cover this year for the new Madden game. My favorite Steeler besides Big Ben, Troy Polamalu will the on the cover with Larry Fitzgerald.

Brett Favre was on last year's cover and look what the hell happened to him! The cover is super jinxed! Ahhhhhhhhhhhhh why couldn't they have put stupid concussion Kurt Warner and Larry on the cover??? Or Joe Flacco?? I hate the Ravens. Someone, anyone else but Troy!

Thursday, April 23, 2009

Jake Delhomme Gets a New Deal

According to Jake Delhomme was signed to a 5 year contract extension with the Panthers.

They are reporting the deal is worth around $42.5 million dollars with $20 million guaranteed.

A 5 year deal for a QB that is 34 years old kind of seems like a bit long, especially for one that has had some health issues of late. For their sake, I hope he will be worth the money they shelled out.

Tony Gonzalez Traded Today is reporting that Tony Gonzalez has been traded to the Atlanta Falcons for a 2010 2nd round draft pick.

I know it has been talked about for awhile now but it kind of suprises me for some reason. Especially getting nothing for him right now...this will not make the Chiefs fans happy at all.

Tuesday, April 21, 2009

Hines Ward Won't Hold Out

Hines Ward is entering the last year on his contract and unlike 2005 he will not hold out until he gets a new contract.

"The contract, we're just going to play and whatever happens happens,'' Ward told the paper.

"I want to be a Steeler ... I don't want to put on another uniform. I'm late in the game now to worry about it. You look at all the previous players who went on and played for other places. I learned a lot from Jerome (Bettis), what he did. I want to go down in Steelers history to be one of the better wideouts to wear the black and gold."

I hope the Steelers re-sign him and let him continue being a Steeler until he is ready to hang it up. I love watching this guy play and he is the best blocking receivers in the league.

Source: USA Today

Monday, April 20, 2009

Torry Holt Gets A New Deal

Torry Holt has signed a 3 year, $20 million dollar deal with the Jacksonville Jaguars.

I thought Holt would be signed much sooner than this. The Jags needed a wide out considering all the drama with Matt Jones and Reggie William's lack of production.

Somewhere David Garrard is doing the Macarena.

Matt Millen Going to ESPN???

USA Today is reporting that ESPN has hired Matt Millen as an NFL and college analyst.

How does this idiot keep getting jobs??? Seriously?? He should be working the drive thru at Dairy Queen. No, wait, that is an insult to Dairy Queen drive thru workers.

I just don't understand how a man can ruin a team for many years and get hired as an analyst. What the hell does he know? I bet I could have made then have at least one winning season in all those years. If he were drafting this year, you know Crabtree would go #1 to Detroit. Without a doubt.

Denver Rolls Past New Orleans

Chauncey Billups lit up the Pepsi Center last night. He finished with 36 points and 8 three pointers.

"I just got it going. It's just one of those special nights that you have sometimes," Billups said after his first postseason appearance in his hometown.

The trade to get Billups to Denver for Allen Iverson is looking better and better all the time. Oh I am so pumped I can't stand it. If they can actually win a 1st round in the playoffs I would be so thrilled.

Sunday, April 19, 2009

Letter to Dana White

Dear Mr. White,

I purchased last night's event in beautiful HD which cost me a total of $54.95. Let me tell you exactly what it was worth...zilch. Granted the Anderson Silva fight was the worst by far, the the "co-main event" was just as bad. Chuck Liddell vs Mauricio "Shogun" Rua was not even close. Liddell once again was hit right on the button and out he went. Liddell is done dude. He was huge for the sport but he shouldn't be fighting anymore. As much as I enjoy looking at "Shogun", it was not worth watching. Actually, it was very sad to watch.

Anderson Silva is supposed to be the best fighter around. If I am the best fighter around, I want to cruise through my opponents as quickly as possible and move on. Last night was close to what I imagine water boarding to be like. I just wanted it to stop. If he is the best fighter in the world, then he should have been far more aggressive and knocked Leites out at the very latest, 2nd round. No way in hell this fight should have gone all 5 rounds. Dana, did you hear the boos??? They hated it. They are the ones that I feel bad for the most. I put out less than $60 but there is no telling what the tickets cost those poor folks in Montreal.

Dana, the economy is a mess. Money is more and more difficult to come up with. So I see a couple of ways you can save your ass after this disaster. Next fight is free. That's right you heard me, give away UFC 98. Or the better solution, give us for free...UFC 100. Your huge pay per view night, just give it away. Because let me tell you, I will never ever pay for an Anderson Silva fight again. Ever. I don't care if he does drop down in weight and fight GSP. I won't pay for it. Chuck Liddell could fight Donald Trump and I wouldn't pay to see it. Not even for the comedic value of it. These were not main events, these were boring, terrible fights. If I want to be bored I can watch re-runs of "Charles in Charge" for free.

I am just so disappointed Dana. I don't know if I can ever forgive you for this.



Friday, April 17, 2009

Jimmy's Freaky Friday

My good buddy Jimmy would like to have his little corner on my blog and he has decided to name it "Frisky Friday". He is going to highlight the women he thinks are hot. Similar to T-bones "Hump Day Hotties", but Jimmy picks the chicks. So, the first Frisky Friday victim is....Cheryl Tweedy.

Tuesday, April 14, 2009

Steelers To Return To Superbowl in 2010

Yep, that is what my bedroom looks like. Well I might have some dirty socks and "Entertainment" magazines scattered around my floor, but that is pretty much it. From this bed, I dream at night of another Superbowl victory for my beloved Steelers. Looks like my dreams might just come true.

The new NFL schedule has come out and well we got this. You heard it hear first...mark it down...come back and congratulate me after it happens. We are going to the Superbowl and we are going to win (um, please block out that I say every year the Cubs will win the World Series...we are all allowed a few mistakes right??). So I will take you through the schedule game by game and spell it out for you. Here we go...

Tenn vs Pitt- Remember last year when Fatty Lendale White stomped all over the Terrible Towel??? Payback is a bitch Lendale.

Pitt @ Chicago- In September??? Game over, Steelers win. Cutler cries about not being back in Denver.

Pitt@ Cinci- Duh.

SD @ Pitt- This one might be a tough one. Won 11-10 last year at home. I think we can do something like that again. How about 13-12??

Pitt@ Detroit- Duh.

Cleveland @ Pitt- Another duh.

Minnesota@ Pitt- This will be a tough game but I think Pitt will win because Tomlin will want to beat his old team up.

Bye week

Pitt @ Denver-Orton at QB. Game over.

Cinci@ Pitt- Duh

Pitt@ KC- Um, oh my gosh. I will be there for real. Saving up money for tickets right now. Pittsburgh has never lost a game that I have attended in person. Game over.

Pitt@ Balt- tough one, might be our first loss. Maybe.

Oak@ Pitt- DUH.

Pitt@ Cleveland- Another easy one.

GB@ Pitt- I think it will be close but Aaron will screw it up having flashbacks of Brett Favre throwing TD bombs and will launch a few Int's. Game over.

Balt@ Pitt- We can beat them at home.

Pitt@ Miami- Chad Pennington can only throw 10 yards down the field. How can we not win???

That is it! I was relieved to see it, I thought it would be a super tough schedule. Doesn't look too bad to me.

My Mexican Fantasy Man Retires

Look at those abs. How could you not have fantasies about this man??? Yea, I guess if you are a guy it might be a little hard (no pun intended) to go there but for the ladies out there this dude is a dream come true.

So it made me sad today to hear he is retiring from boxing. Oscar retires with a record of 39-6 with 30 of those wins being by knockout. The last few fights Oscar has taken on did not turn out so well so I understand his decision to call it quits.

Oscar is really the only boxer I enjoyed watching fight. Mayweather Jr. irritates me to no end. He is the Kayne of boxing. Manny Pacquiao is an amazing boxer but he just doesn't do it for me. I guess I will be watching even more MMA fights.

Oscar, you were the best and you will be missed. You did many great things for the sport of boxing.

Monday, April 13, 2009

James Harrison Inks Deal With Steelers

Thank you baby Jesus and anyone else that had a part in this going down...

The James Harrison has signed a contract extension with the Steelers for 6 more years! The deal is being reported on as worth about $51.175 million.

Thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you Pittsburgh Steelers for not letting this one get away!

Sunday, April 12, 2009

My Giant Leap of Faith

I was watching the Cubs vs Brewers game yesterday on the Directv free preview. The Cubs were not playing very well, down a few runs to start the game. I stopped watching in the 5th and made a major decision at that time. I had been tossing around buying the entire baseball season package from Directv but it is a lot of money and would I have time to watch enough baseball games to make it worth having. So I decided to leave my decision to the Cubs. If they came back and won yesterday's game, I would buy it, if not then I would not. Well, they came back and won the game.

This afternoon I sat down and ordered the MLB package. I have never bought this before and I am not sure I ever will again. But I still believe in the Cubs. This HAS to be their year and I can watch all of it from my living room. I have a beautiful 65 inch HD television and what was playing on the HD tv's at Best Buy the 1st time I ever saw the power of HD??? A baseball game. The bright green grass had me mesmerized and that was it. I got a tv and now I have baseball games to watch on my tv.

I hope and pray the Cubs don't disappoint again this year. This time I have invested some money into them.

Leftwich Signs With Tampa

I had thought Jon Gruden was the great QB collector down in Tampa but it seems it must be the organization.

The Tampa Bay Bucs have signed Byron Leftwich to a 2 year deal, stealing him from the mighty Steelers.

I sure hope Dennis Dixon can get ready real fast.

Friday, April 10, 2009

NFL Schedule to Be Released Tuesday

The NFL has announced they will release the regular season schedule on Tuesday, April 14th at 7pm eastern.

I can hardly wait to check out the Steelers full season schedule!

Steelers Offer Leftwich 2 Year Deal

The Steelers are looking to keep Byron Leftwich on the roster as Roethlisberger's backup. They have offered him a 2 year deal at the league minimum salary for those years.

Not much of a deal really but does he have any better offers?

Thursday, April 9, 2009

Marshawn Lynch Suspended 3 Games

According to ESPN's sources, Marshawn Lynch has been suspended 3 games by the NFL. The reason is for violating the league's personal conduct policy.

Back in February, Lynch got arrested for having a concealed gun in his car.

When are these guys going to learn they need to leave their guns at home???

Tuesday, April 7, 2009

Blake Griffin To Enter The NBA

Blake Griffin announced today he will enter the NBA draft. For some reason I thought he might stay one more year. Money talks and college sucks.

I think he will be a pretty good NBA player, I think he will be far better than Tyler Hansbrough.

Monday, April 6, 2009

What Happens In Vegas...Stays in Vegas???

I just got back from my 4 day trip to Vegas. My duties were to help out during a radio broadcast from the Academy of Country Music Awards. Sounds fun and exciting eh? Yes, I met many country stars (Taylor Swift, Carrie Underwood, Rascal Flatts, John Rich and many more) but I worked my ass off. I got in at noon and worked until 11pm that night. My boss for the 3 day adventure woke me up at 4:30am to get back at it. I do not do well without sleep. Not at all. My eyelids look like someone had beaten me with a ball bat. I guess the good thing about going around looking like that is people actually think I might have been out drinking all night long instead of working...adds to my cool factor. I worked all morning on Friday and the event started right at noon. It was insane. I cannot even describe to you the stress of it all. One country singer after another. I was downloading interview files and converting them and sending them to the radio station. Mucho stress.

We were about 20 minutes into this process when I look over at the Kansas City table and who do I see standing there?????????????????? Jared Allen. Uh huh. A football player in the middle of a mountain of country singers. It was like heaven. A dream come true. First, I think he is really hot so that always helps. Secondly, he is a sports star! I live for sports! Without thinking, I rushed over to him, leaving my post un-maned and getting me in BIG trouble with the boss. I tapped him on his massive bulging gun and he slowly turned around. I looked like a midget next to him. I told him I am a big fan of his, told him he is a BEAST (yep that came flying out of my mouth) and that I love watching him play and I was sooooooooooooooooooooooo mad when KC let him go up to Minnesota. He was laughing. Yep at me because I am a retard. The next thought that entered my head since I had already made a fool of myself was just to mount him. Can't help it, he is super hot. I talked myself down from that one thank goodness and just told him I am from Missouri and saw lots of his games and that I love his energy. He said thanks, I asked him to sign a playing card for me and he did. Poor bastard could not wait to get away from my stalker ass.

Anywho, that was by far the highlight of my trip. I was barely fed, got very little sleep and had no time to spend in the sports book. But I met Jared Allen!